Happy New Year Reader!

Last week I ended my email to you with a PS that I wouldn't be sending more emails because I was lying on the couch, reading books and eating Christmas cookies.

THAT WAS A LIE.

I didn't mean for it to be. I had every intention of parking my rear under our new, faux Minky blanket and tearing through my new Louise Penney.

But, then I started thinking about the returns I needed to make, and the fact I hadn't checked my email in a week, and that we had visitors coming and I hadn't really planned out the trip. And then the kids wanted to tell me stories, and a friend texted to see if I could walk, and all the Christmas chaos started getting on my nerves and I really needed to get some of it cleaned up, and before you know it, the nearest I've come to the couch is Swiffering off the kids' cookie crumbs.

Also, I'm terrible at relaxing.

Part of it is I live in a never-ending to do list. Part of it is I'm a doer. Part of it is I haven't practiced ever.

A lot of the writers I follow on Substack talk about days spent reading books and I always think, "HOW?"

I'm religious about my 20 minutes of reading a night, but the rest is snatched in minutes while I'm blowdrying my hair, standing in line, or guiltily (yes, I said it) reading when I feel like I'm "supposed" to be doing something else.

So, this year, my resolution that's just for me*: Work on relaxing and read a book for an hour - guilt-free - once a week.

I'm sure many of you are like: OMG, just sit down and read it, woman!

But, that's the thing with growing - we've got to figure out our own special brand of issues and how to move through them, right?

Now, this ain't my first rodeo - I'm proud to say I've accomplished every resolution I've set for the past 12 years, in part because of the quick criteria I've developed.

(I also teach this, more in-depth, in my free workshop How to Make Resolutions You'll Actually Keep)

So, grab your resolution and ask yourself:

1. Is this something I actually want to do?
   ​Let's get real. If it's something that you feel like you "have to do" or "should do", it's going to fall off your to do list faster than a teen bailing out of the Chicken Dance at your cousin's wedding.
   ​
   So, ask yourself: Does this sound like it's going to suck? Because if it does, it's going to be the first thing to go once your willpower and momentum start to wane...
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2. Is it fun?
   ​You have enough Not Fun things in your life. Let's not add to the list, okay?
   ​
   If your resolution enhances your life and adds more joy to it, I can practically guarantee you're going to be successful. Having fun is addictive!
   ​
   Once you remember how good it feels, you'll want to add more of it to your life so make this sucker enjoyable.
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3. Is it small?
   ​Most of the time, we make these massive resolutions that require overhauling our entire life in order to make it happen.
   ​
   Think about dieting. When we go on a diet, what happens with the family - are they also on the diet? Or what do you do when you're on a road trip and McDonalds is your only option? Or what if you really, really want to eat your mom's special chocolate decadence cake she only makes once a year?
   ​
   Those are big shifts that require a Willpower of Steel.
   ​
   Instead, if you can make it a small shift instead of a major change (eat a salad one night a week), you'll trick your brain into thinking it's a no brainer and you'll probably follow through.
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4. Know why you want to do it
   ​I work out at least five days a week, which is something I've wanted to do my entire life.
   ​
   It was on every resolution list I can remember - work out consistently - but it didn't really stick until I figured out my real "why."
   ​
   I assumed my motivation was what I looked like, but as soon as I could zip up my "skinny" jeans, I'd bail because I don't actually care that much.
   ​
   Once I figured out though, it keeps my brain healthy and my emotions level, that was a true motivator and now I hardly ever miss.
   ​
   Ask yourself: What's at the root of this? What will I get if I follow through? And then see how it feels in your body. If it feels easier to breathe, you've got a winner!

If this is striking a chord, maybe hop over and watch the replay for How to Make Resolutions You'll Actually Keep) ?
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We go a little deeper into each of these criteria, plus, you'll learn two shifts that'll set you up for success, and we talk through the different categories of resolutions so you can choose one that fits your life right now.

This may feel like a lot of work for what most people consider a throwaway, yearly event, but I see it as a promise to yourself.

If you're always bailing on your commitments to yourself, you eventually stop trusting your ability to try new things.

But, if you follow through, you start to rebuild that faith and confidence in yourself and then who knows where it can take you!

So, let's take the first (tiny) step together and create a fun, doable resolution that you'll absolutely get done.

Here's to baby resolutions (and learning to relax 🤪)!
xx. Kara

*The lovely Nat asked in the class how many resolutions I made a year and I said one. THIS IS ALSO A LIE.

I forgot I made two this year. 😂 You'll have to watch the class to see what the other one is, mwahahahaha!